“No rum in the captain’s barrel
There’s rum on the captain’s table
And rum in the captain’s crew
So buy the captain rum!”
~Abney Park
Shiver me circuits, Wonderplace Alpha brims with a wild galaxy of fantastical and freaky goings-on—happenings so vast and bizarre, they’d make a Hobbit’s second breakfast or a Klingon’s war chant seem tame! Yet, when the warp drives sputter and ye crave a respite with our rum-sodden posse, take heart—we’re lashed to the mast right here. At the saloon, we’re swilling rum like Captain Jack Sparrow wailing, “But why is the rum gone?” from Pirates of the Caribbean—a lament we dodge with barrels aplenty. Some spin yarns of starships and dragons, others lurk over their grog, brooding like Riddick in Pitch Black growling, “I’d take a slug of that rum right about now.” Ye know the den: that steampunk-scarred saloon, all weathered planks and smoky haze, where misfits from Tatooine to Tortuga hoist their cups. Even Thor’d fit in, thundering, “Another! More drink, you fools!”—though we swap wine for rum, naturally. So swagger in, ye scoundrels—snag a tankard and revel with us. Yer weirdness be the spice in our rum-soaked saga!